Thank you! Thank you!

Okay, so here goes the Blog Challenge Round 1. "To write an Award acceptance speech."

"Wow, wow, I'm so speechless! I can't believe that I really... wow, this is just amazing, thank you so much! I honestly wasn't expecting this, I don't have anything prepared..." (pulls out a huge piece of paper from cleavage, leaving cleavage noticeably lessened) "execpt this short list of people without whom I never would have gotten this far! I'd like to say a big thank you, firstly, for the judges, for having the foresight to see that I was clearly the most talented person in the running for this award. Your perception and recognition is amazing, and I congratulate you on that!"
*applause*
"Oh, wow, this is just so... wow, it's unbelievable! Who would have ever thought!"
*laughs*
"I'd like to thank the designer who made my dress, for having the brilliance and wisdom to be able to design a dress that complements my amazing figure and actually enhances my beauty instead of detracting from it - you are a true genius and I love you so much!"
*applause*
"Of course I have to thank the make up people, the lighting technicians and the cameramen tonight - who have made me look so beautiful, you are truely wonderful and I know that this will be a night that you will remember forever, having the honour to make me look so hot, thank you thank you!"
*whistles from backstage, scattered applause from the crowd*
"I'd like to thank the runners up, for just not being as good as me - you gave it your best and you fell short, but God bless you for that my friends, God bless you."
*silence...*
"But most of all, I have to thank you, the audience, my peers, without you I would have no one to show off in front off, no one to gloat to, well - there'd be nobody to beat would there!"
*jeers and booing*
"So thank you, thank you all for being here on this night, this important night! I'll be out the back signing autographs in just a few moments, you can all form a bit of a queue and I promise I'll sign them all! Unless I get bored, maybe actually the important people should come up the front of the queue, could you do that? Thank you! Thank you so much! I love you all!"
*tomatoes thrown onstage, Amy hauled offstage sharpish*